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Peer Pressure

Children are exposed to an incredible amount of negative peer pressure in public schools, and one of the reasons parents teach their children at home is to avoid that pressure. Yet, schools are for the most part merely a convergence of peer expectations. The field of peer influence is much larger than the school classroom and playground. To teach children thoroughly to react appropriately to peer values, several defensive and offensive strategies need to be used.

Radio and television programmers stay up-to-date with what appeals to various age groups and pattern their programming accordingly. Advertising agencies also play a big role in depicting the characteristics of the "in crowd." Your child merely has to walk into a clothing store or look through a magazine to be drawn to the clothes that will make him acceptable to his peers. He hears the newest vocabulary on television or picks it up from billboards and other advertising mediums. On several occasions I caught myself saying to one of my children, "Where did you hear that?" of "What does that mean?" A typical reply was, "Oh, Dad! Everybody is saying it." My first impulse was to blame their friends or to wonder what their friends' parents were doing with their children. After I started listening for the peer talk, I realized I did not need to go out of my own home in order for my children to be exposed to negative values.

Peer identity is based on three main factors: symbols, attitudes, and conformity. Symbols can include hair and clothing styles, jewelry, or any number of gestures. Negative attitudes are expressed about everything and everyone that does not fit into the peer pattern. Conformity to the peer group is absolutely necessary, and that means not conforming to adult expectations. Be award of those things that your child should avoid so that he will not be identified with the wrong crowd, while at the same time don't shelter him so much that he is needlessly labeled as weird.

Several defensive strategies can be employed to encourage proper attitudes about peer pressure. Read More

 

Reprinted from Home School Helper. Used with permission of BJU Press. 

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